Trying

Trying so hard to figure out what’s worthwhile.
The answers seem so far away, yet so close.
Searching through this seemingly endless pile.

Trying to climb upward and leave the past.
All these memories are weighing me down.
Heaving- and my body feels like it might collapse.

Trying to loosen my tightly clenched fist.
My own will keeps somehow replacing yours.
Slipping from the line that my hands have missed.

Trying to just cry and let it all go free.
Emotions clog my clearly thinking mind.
Saying that I don’t believe what I see.

Trying to know why and what to do matter.
My mind thinks that my heart stands tall.
Screaming as I fall off this looming latter.

Trying to wake up and see what is really real.
This fall has shaken me deep down inside.
Sighing from the head and heartache I feel.

Trying to hear my headache- not my heart.
The two war, but neither come out ahead.
Lying in their midst and I can’t tear them apart.

--Written by Sandy Heights
Image by <a href="https://pixabay.com/users/Pexels-2286921/?utm_source=link-attribution&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_campaign=image&amp;utm_content=1838330">Pexels</a> from <a href="https://pixabay.com/?utm_source=link-attribution&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_campaign=image&amp;utm_content=1838330">Pixabay</a>