Losing, Win

I feel so far from where I should be

But my heart won’t take another ‘could be’ from me.

I reach and reach and seem to grow so tall

And this time I say I won’t let myself fall.

But I don’t really want this distance

Between my heart and what I won’t let myself sense.

Because I feel I’m ‘shutting up’ my heart:

It seems like I’m hiding it from the start.

I don’t want to ‘play it safe’- and maybe I don’t-

I’ll talk and laugh, but ‘open up’… is something I won’t.

We all want the love, but not the pain.

But through the pain, love learns to grow in the rain.

Right now, I can’t exactly describe how I feel.

But in this life, there’s always a turning wheel.

I want there to be more than what I see right now

And I have to trust there is; though, I don’t know how.

This turning wheel makes me stop, run, ‘grow up,’ and spin again;

You always have to lose something in order to win.

-Wrriten by Sandy Heights

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